I heard an add for this on the radio a few weeks ago and thought it was a joke. The ad might have been a joke, but the product, it appears, is real:

Bacon Scented Bacon Print Tuxedo

There’s a theory that everything is better with bacon. We believe that theory with all of our heart. To that end, we are introducing our line of bacon formal wear with Uncle Oinker’s Bacon Scented Bacon Print Tuxedo. You can get married in bacon, get confirmed in bacon or go to the Oscars in bacon! Wait until Joan Rivers gets a whiff of you. Each Tuxedo is tailored from chemically treated latex print fabric in one of four different sizes. Best of all, it smells just like bacon sizzling in the pan. Dry clean only.

I can think of few things more stomach-churning than the idea of clothing that smells like bacon. Even the idea of clothing made of actual bacon is less repugnant to me. I really hate the smell of sizzling bacon.

From the mad geniuses at Archie McPhee:

Mr. Bacon and Monsieur Tofu are fired up and ready to rumble, but only one can remain at the top of the food chain! Mr. Bacon stands 5-5/8″ tall and fights for everything salty, greasy and meaty. Monsieur Tofu is 3-3/8″ tall and represents all things made of coagulated soy milk. The winner gets eaten for dinner! Each vinyl figure has bendable arms and legs.

If you’re like me and you don’t actually eat bacon, that doesn’t mean you can’t still get your meat on courtesy of our good friends at Archie McPhee.

Just hop on over to the Bacon/Meat Category in their online catalog and stock up on bacon-related products for the whole family. From Bacon Strip Bandages to swanky Meat Shower Curtains, they’ve got you covered. Sadly, Uncle Oinker’s Gummy Bacon contains real strawberry flavoring, which I am most allergic to.